Now, I don’t know about you lot, but me, I think a few naughty people have interpreted Islam wrongly. I mean apart from the odd verse of the Koran here and the odd book of Bukhari there, I really don’t know much about the religion at all. But what really worries me is that so many other people around the World also fail to realise what a beautiful and peaceful religion it really is. The religion has been completely misunderstood by just a tiny percentage of extremists and (oh, and maybe one or two others). I’ve even heard that there is an Islamic government somewhere in the World that just doesn’t get it and that’s really shocking! Now I’d like to give you this example of the government that have lost the plot when it comes to understanding the Prophet’s beautiful message to mankind, but off the top of my head I can’t really remember much about this government, but I’ll give it a go!
Now, I think I remember reading somewhere that Saudi Arabia was supposed to be one of those Muslim nations but I’m not 100% sure and judging by the way the Saudi government messes about with the teachings of Islam I don’t think they’re exactly sure either.You see in Saudi Arabia they have barbaric punishments like stoning. Women are oppressed and treated worse than cattle, and Judaism, Christianity and other faiths apart from Islam are banned. Slavery is practised too despite being officially illegal. In fact when it comes to human rights their record is shall we say… not really that good!
Did you also hear the shocking story about the 14 girls who died when their school caught on fire and they weren’t allowed out of the building because they weren’t wearing hijabs and had no male relatives to escort them out.? Also the rescuers weren’t allowed inside because they were all male and therefore not allowed to mix with females. That’s a shocking story don’t you think? Still, never mind, maybe it’s just the Saudis that don’t understand what Islam is meant to be all about. Now let’s take a look at another Islamic Republic and let me show you how they have actually got it right.
Iran, yes, Iran! Now in Iran they have er… public stoning, homosexuals are persecuted and Jewish and Zoroastrian minorities are persecuted, and the government wish to see the entire destruction of Israel. No, no, no! Now that can’t be right!
Oh well, never mind, maybe both the Saudis and Iran just don’t understand what Islam is all about!
Let’s go to another Islamic state: Pakistan. Aah, beautiful, beautiful Pakistan, an Islamic paradise on Earth. Now let’s see, what do we know about Pakistan? Well, it has a Muslim majority (so far, so good) and the Hindu and Christian minorities are persecuted by the majority and are discriminated against in legal matters. Brutal Sharia law rules over much of the country, more than one woman has been known to have been blinded and disfigured by having acid thrown in her face and the border tribal areas are rife with wanted terrorists and Taliban chiefs. Now hang on, that can’t be right either.
Oh well, never mind, maybe Saudi Arabia, Iran and Pakistan just don’t understand what Islam is all about! We need to find a proper Muslim country. Ah, yes, here’s one… Somalia.
Now the Somalis are succumbing to the rule of the beautiful religion more and more each day. That’s good news for starters. In Somalia they now have ever more barbaric Sharia law courts, people are being stoned to death for adultery and other triflings, sea piracy is a flourishing trade, pleasurable activities such as football and music are banned and the cruel act of Female Genital Mutilation is rife almost everywhere. Ok, stop right there! There’s something not quite right here either.
Oh well, never mind, maybe Saudi Arabia, Iran, Pakistan and Somalia just don’t understand what Islam is all about!
In fact, I’ve just thought about all the Islamic states that I can remember, and I’m shocked how so many Muslim states have completely misinterpreted Allah’s loving words. You think that these so-called Muslims nations would know better. Oh well, never mind, maybe Saudi Arabia, Iran, Pakistan, Somalia, Afghanistan, Egypt, Yemen, Sudan, Libya, Syria, Bangladesh, the Palestinian territories, Qatar and Iraq just don’t understand what Islam is all about!
What we need now is someone that does understand what the religion of peace is all about. Who can I think of? Let me see. We want someone who really understands the Muslim scriptures. We all know that the Koran is subject to misinterpretation and is a very, very, very holy and very truthful book. It is not any old book like some people think it is, nor is it a badly-written mish-mash of caustic drivel put together by semi-literate Arabs like some idiots that I know think it is. It is the word of the Lord and has to be read over and over and over again and studied for years before you can understand it’s beautiful loving message.
Now who do we know who claims to have done such a thing? Maybe the late great Ayatollah of Iran, Ruollah Khomeini, you know the 1979 revolution guy!
Well, he was such a kind and saintly man wasn’t he? What sort of things did he do? Let me see. Well for starters he issued a fatwa, a death sentence in this case, on a man simply for writing a book ( you remember that Rushdie fellow) and the Ayatollah once made a speech condoning anal sex with children. He was also responsible for lots of tortures and things. Now wait a minute… no, sorry it looks like he got it wrong as well.
Now I’m in a bit of a muddle. I just simply can’t believe that so many people just don’t understand Islam. Why don’t they get it? I’m going to have to go back to basics here. Really back to basics. Let’s ask none other than the Prophet Mohammed himself. Now he must be able to understand the Koran. After all he’s the one who bloody well wrote it (sort of). Now Mohammed, what was he like? Well for starters, he was a murderer, a thief, a coward, a liar, a rapist, a paedophile and a raving lunatic. Oh, no….. now it looks like he didn’t understand Islam either. You think that he would, seeing as he is the one who invented it! I give up. It seems to me that believing Islam is a beautiful and loving religion of peace is obviously nothing to do with knowledge of it, practising it, or even living in an Islamic society.
The only ones who really, really understand what Islam is all about, the ones who really know that it is peaceful and just, are the ones who never have anything to do with it, don’t practise it and know absolutely nothing at all about it!
You see ignorance really is bliss!
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